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Book Journeys Author Interview – July 21, 2016

 

Dr. Angela Lauria with Colleen Troy, author of Now or Never for Scaredy-Cats: Stop Hiding, Break Some Rules and Have Way More Fun Before It’s Too Late.

 

Don’t wait.” ~Colleen Troy

 

Angela:

Well, hey, everybody! We are back for another episode of Book Journeys Radio. So great to be with you guys here today. You know, the purpose of this show is really to help people who have, for a long time, wanted to write a book – … book, first book, their second book – and they haven’t been able to get it done and they’re wondering why they’re – they’re wondering what’s standing in their way. And we really couldn’t have a better guest to talk about this than Colleen Troy, who is the author of Now or Never for Scaredy-Cats: Stop Hiding, Break Some Rules and Have Way More Fun Before it’s Too Late. So, obviously, Colleen’s work as a – as a Living Fully, Dying Wisely coach is really focused on whatever your dreams are. But if you’re listening to this show and maybe you see yourself as a bit of a scaredy-cat, and pulling that trigger, being – being as an author has been challenging for you, I think the message is not only from how Colleen write her book but actually learning more about the book itself is really gonna help you figure out how are you hiding, why you might need to break some rules and is it possible that now is the time to get your book done. So, I’m so excited to have, as my guest today, Colleen Troy, Colleen, welcome to the show!

 

Colleen:

Oh, thank you so much, Angela! Very, very happy to be here.

 

Angela:

Awesome, well, let’s just start off by telling people about Now or Never for Scaredy-Cats, what’s your book about and who is it for?

 

Colleen:

Sure, my book is all about recognizing that I’ve lived a life in a place of fear, more than a place of – I guess, bravery or just solidly standing in my own place, say, “Here I am, world, look at me! I’ve got gifts to share, I have things I have to say,” and just recognizing that I – at the age of fifty-five, when I wrote the book, it’s – it’s – it’s – it’s time! There’s a lot of years that are behind me. I’ve lived a lot of life, and I’ve lived a great life, actually. I have a lot of things to be grateful for, but there’s this fine line, then, when you get to middle age, where you recogni – I recognized, “Oh! What’s the space in front of me, here, this life in front of me is a little more unknown, as far as my time …. It’s now or never.” And part of that – the impetus to move into the speed of “Now or never” has to do with help – again, middle age, losing my father and my brother to cancer and put – that – that shakes you up a little bit, and –

 

Angela:

Mmm.

 

Colleen:

– I recognized – I recognized it’s – it’s – I don’t wanna live in that place of fear, so, starting forward, I don’t wanna live in that place of fear.

 

Angela:

Yeah, I love that. So, when you wrote your book, you talked about three – three different fundamentals that you have for your readers. Hiding is one of those big concepts, so how do you think hiding stops people from doing a project like … finishing a book, or doing an adventure race, or some of the other things that people might not do, what – what is hiding about?

 

Colleen:

Yes, sure. It’s about – for me, it was all about self-expression, but being afraid to really open my mouth at times and really saying, “This is … speaking my truth” to – to people in relationships, personally, or –

 

Angela:

Mmm.

 

Colleen:

– to a – strangers, to speaking my truth. And so, a – as a scaredy-cat, you – I’m worried about … being self-conscious or maybe not having the limelight shining on me, and yet, there’s this inner voice, Angela, that – that’s really wanting to break free and break loose from those fears, and say, “I’ve got – I’ve got – … ideas, I have creativity and I want to … them.” And so, … writing a book – that’s – that is the – that’s something I’ve thought about for a long, long time, and as a scaredy-cat I – I just didn’t take action on that desire because of my fear of self-expression. And I have to say that the book has come out, a – I have definitely experienced a sense of liberation and I want that to continue.

 

Angela:

That’s awesome. And so, let’s talk about breaking some rules. That’s – that doesn’t – that – that doesn’t always seem to fit with scaredy-cats, they feel like scaredy-cats wanna follow the rules, so why is breaking the rules important?

 

Colleen:

Okay. I – I realized that I’m my own worst offender when it comes to creating rules and living by them. I actually don’t like it when people tell me what to do, in life, that I … have a rebellious streak with that, but when I really took time to look at my life, I realized that I was the one imposing limitations on myself. And so – for instance, when I talk about losing my dad and my brother – younger brother to cancer, I – my husband and I had owned a business, we sold it and we didn’t immediately go into the next realm of – of career or work. We told – we told ourselves, “We wanna take a gap here for midlife people, and we wanted to give ourselves a little bit of space before we decided what we wanted to do next. And what I’m talking about here is, … the rules of, “Oh, you gotta keep working and working and saving for retirement,” because we weren’t going to retire yet, we’re still actively engaged in work, and – and yet, we knew what was important, because that time of retirement is kinda vague, too –

 

Angela:

Mmm.

 

Colleen:

– it’s unknown. So, how do – how I know that I’m gonna buy a teardrop trailer when I’m sixty-five or seventy, and I’m gonna go on a six-month journey with it. I don’t know that. But we took the – the risk to – and – and we bought that teardrop trailer and we traveled and enjoyed ourselves, doing things outdoors that we love to do, we’re physically fit and able to do that and – that’s wh – that’s breaking the rules, …. I had a lot of people say, “Ew! You – you know – really? You’re gonna do that?” And “Should you really be doing that?” So, that’s just an example of –

 

Angela:

Yeah.

 

Colleen:

– just taking the time to reflect on – on recognizing what – what am I telling myself about limitations and what limitations am I setting for myself. It’s … bust those limitations.

 

Angela:

All right, and then, the third pillar here is all about having fun. Tell me about having fun and is that something that comes naturally to you, it seems like everybody – having fun should be easy, wha – why does that need some guidance?

 

Colleen:

Okay. Oh, well, that’s – … ties in with the – the rule of setting and the … limitations because – I – I have – … I’m fifty-five years old, I grew up i – with the values of, you work hard a – you work hard and you work hard and then you play some. And those – that structure … has stayed with me for a long time, and yet  I realized that – again, looking forward, I – do I wanna be constantly with my nose to the ground – grindstone, and not ta – and only allow … the little piece of the fun here and there. When I write a “to do” list, I write about breaking free of writing to-do lists, I was – I – the best “to do” list writer you have ever met, but I realized that, if I woke up wr – made that to-do list, that’s all I focus on all day long, and – and I get ‘complish this task, I understand that, but when I – somebody like me, we just follow that w – … that to-do list, there’s no space to breathe in there, there’s no room for creativity, and so, it was time for me to – to totally break that habit, and I have been free of that list writing habit for a bunch of years now, and it just allows for the space for possibilities and creativity!

 

Angela:

Yeah, so good, I love it. Well, let’s talk a little bit about the process of writing your book. What was – during the process of writing, one of the things was the biggest challenge that you faced, and how did you overcome it?

 

Colleen:

I – I guess the biggest challenge for me, in writing the book, was to – to really fully let go of doubt, that what I had to say mattered. So, in other words, the process of telling my stories and writing that was pretty easy, and yet, at – there were times when I would go – go to the computer and – and look at what I’d written, and then – … those – those little moments of doubt, saying, “Okay, really? Do you really think peopl – … people wanna read this?” But when I signed up, Angela, for your program, I was – I know that place where I was, I know the moment I said, “Yes, I’m gonna do this,” and it was with absolute confidence that I knew I could do it. So – just – so – challenge was ta – listening to those moments of doubt and then putting aside, so I continue writing the chapter.

 

Angela:

Love it. I love it. A lot of times, when people get stuck writing – maybe it’s writer’s block, maybe it’s procrastination, maybe it’s just … a sense of dread that they don’t know what to say, one of the things that I have found works really well is adding a movement. So, going for a walk, going for a swim – my authors who have belief problems have dogs. Anyone who’s had to walk their dog a couple of times a day is … one of the best gifts for writers, and I know that you incorporated movement into your writing process, talk a little bit about how that worked for you and what the effect was.

 

Colleen:

Oh, just absolutely – absolutely, belief in moving the body to – to – again, feel a little freer. That’s how I felt. When I was … sitting at the computer, knowing – … I had X number more … thoughts to process, and try and stay coherent with that – with those thoughts, but yet, I was struggling and time was ticking, I said – I – I recognized, I needed to say, “Enough.” Close the computer, and the absolute best thing that worked for me was to just put on my shoes and go for a walk. And what I would do would be to … place the intention or the seed within me that, as I started the walk – okay, this is the place in my writing where I’m stuck, and just recognizing that and feeling certain that … I can continue when I go get back, and I would know what the next sentences would be. But I wouldn’t focus on that on the walk, I would just start walking my body, and honestly, for me, I would just get insights as I would be walking along, random insights that would make me … recognize, “Oh, yeah, that’s what I can say next.” And if – so, I wasn’t suffering at those times of – and – and I also know that I had originally planned six chapters in my book, but it was on one of the walks that I realized what the … – seventh chapter was gonna be all about, and that was really fun and exciting to have those moments of fla – insights, … flashes.

 

Angela:

I love that … yeah, they are flashes, and here is the thing. I – I don’t know if you have this experience, but for me, I have the exact, same experience, and yet I’m surprised by it every time. And I also – … “I just came up with this idea out of nowhere!” … – No, what you did was, you created these states for the idea to show up for you, … you created some space in your head in between to-do lists about … dinner and taxes and hot water heaters and all the things  in our life, when you can create that space, they’re ideas that are yours, that – it’s almost like you haven’t earned them, you haven’t … really been available – … been available to receive your own –

 

Colleen:

Yes!

 

Angela:

– your own inner wisdom.

 

Colleen:

Yes, absolutely.

 

Angela:

So, though it feels like a miracle, … “Oh, I don’t know how this happened!” But it actually does work quite consistently.

 

Colleen:

Absolutely. Total … it.

 

Angela:

Yup. Love it. Awesome. So, I know you tried to write a book in the past, many of our listeners have been trying to work – write the same book or many other books, and I am wondering why do you think, this time, you were able to finish, what was the difference?

 

Colleen:

So, I signed up for your program, Angela, … two days before I was going to be leaving for six months to work in a business that I helped my husband out with, some of the time. So, six weeks, I was gonna be traveling, the first six weeks of the program, but I – I was also in the space of recognizing that I needed to give – focus my attention on myself, and this was a gift, to give me, to write this book now. My kids were gone and we have … finished the teardrop experience, we moved to North Carolina from Wisconsin, it was … a new beginning kind of a place. But, in addition to that, the – the reason why I could finish the book now was just thi – the entire – the – the broad – I – spectrum of everything that you offer in your program, so, from the get-go, … I – I felt … “Hey, I’m with the crowd here, I’m one of these other … ‘authors in transformation,’” as you call it, and I was listening to the other authors in your program who are really close to publishing, there’s so much excitement and crazy – excitement and crazy stuff that went on at the time, and yet, we watched these authors go into their publication date, and it’s – it’s so fun, it’s wonderful, and you also hear the struggles, … before and – and you can relate to the – their struggle.

 

Angela:

Mmm.

 

Colleen:

The fact that i – I really call it … a turnkey operation, I don’t know if the – how you define it, but I don’t ….

 

Angela:

So, … that – that works, I … one-stop shop, but ….

 

Colleen:

I did not once struggle with wondering, “How am I gonna find an editor, how am I gonna get this thing published,” I don’t know anything about the publishing world. I simply saw your program, saw all the benefits, “Oh, yeah! I get my own personal editor,” you get to – … she knows my focu – w – where I’m focusing on, and it – it’s – you’d handle all the publishing, and it was just – I guess I’m holding my hands in … a baby – … like a mom holds a baby, and I just felt held and the trust that you delivered throughout, … con – consistently throughout the whole process. Trust – this program, it works, and I felt it the whole way, and it – that’s what made me complete the book.

 

Angela:

And tell me about the feeling of finishing. As somebody who’s wanted to write a book multiple times, what did it feel like when your book was done?

 

Colleen:

Yeah, to – to – to use – to hear myself say that I’m an author is to speak that out loud – to even say it right now, there’s a lot of emotion in me because, previous to this time, it’s just been this inside picture that I’ve carried around, an inside dream, so, I carried around and held really tightly, and – again, another form of liberation for the scaredy-cat just to unpronounce those words about myself, to identify as an author is … I have written my book and I’ve often – often used the phrase, “Oh, I just wrote – wrote my first book.” And that just slips out really easily and really seamlessly, for me, but I – I’m ….

 

Angela:

Tell me what that means for you, when you say, “I’ve just written my first book.”

 

Colleen:

Well, to go from years and years and years and years and years of secretly wishing that I’m writing a book that I w – … w – had written a book to all – all of a sudden, it’s reality, is – it’s a … – that miracle and magic thing, … you’re talking about, just – it’s – I’m not ha – I’m not putting the words very well together here to express the feeling, it’s only – it’s simply amazing.

 

Angela:

Do you think that, because you finished your first book, now, you can see more clearly the second book, so, when you say … “I just finished my first book,” it’s … – almost like you’re calling in future books?

 

Colleen:

Yes. Oooh, yes, I am. That’s exactly what I’m doing yes.

 

Angela:

I love that, awesome. What’s the best thing to come out of having a book, for you?

 

Colleen:

Mmm. Well, it ties in with what we’re just talking about, I guess, that i – I no longer have to carry this dream of saying, “I wanna be an author” because I am an author now, and that I – I feel it, in me, and I say I’m an author to people when I’m … meeting somebody for the first time, and I’m honoring the part of me that was kept hidden for a long time.

 

Angela:

Mm.

 

Colleen:

So, the – one of the – that’s one of the best parts, I guess.  The other thing is, I recognize how much I am inspired – yeah, I guess I recognize that I’ve always been inspired by other people’s stories, … that’s … if you like to – if you love to read books, and now you have this business –

 

Angela:

Right.

 

Colleen:

– where you help people write their books. I love hearing stories, and I just started a podcast –

 

Angela:

Mmm!

 

Colleen:

– where I’m interviewing women over fifty. I’m calling it “Bloom, Baby, Bloom: Straight Talk from Now or Never Kind of Women Over Fifty.”

 

Angela:

That’s lovely.

 

Colleen:

And I’m asking them their stories, so it’s feeding me, …. I’ve shared my story about being over fifty and consciously choosing to make changes in my life, and now I get to ask other women their stori – and have them share their stories, and I’m loving it. I’m loving it.

 

Angela:

I love that. I should send people … if they can find out about this on colleentroy.com, or is there a better way to find out about ….?

 

Colleen:

Yes. Yes, yeah. … They can find it on … iTunes and SoundCloud.

 

Angela:

I love it. So, colleentroy.com, and on iTunes and SoundCloud, check out “Bloom, Baby, Bloom,” I love it! And maybe you’re listening and you – you’re over fifty and you have a story, track Colleen down.

 

Colleen:

Yes.

 

Angela:

… to be a guest on her show! I love it.

 

Colleen:

Would love it, because, Angela, some of these stories could be in my next book.

 

Angela:

Ah, fantastic! That’s great! So, tell me what was different, if you were going back in time and gonna talk to yourself just before you signed up for the program,  what – what surprised you, or what was different about writing and publishing a book than you maybe expected?

 

Colleen:

Okay. Well – yeah, big surprise. You had said to – to our groups that, “If you can find … two to four hours a week in your very busy schedule – everybody has commitment, work, family – … their life is scheduled, but if you can find two to four hours a week to write, then you can write a book.” And that was … a light bulb for me. … I – I have already – always carried this romantic il – ideal of a writer who … sits chain-smoking by their computer, and struggling and suffering to write and to produce something, and that is not at a – … that’s not at all the case in my experience of writing this book, and that’s just definitely one thing, in other words, if I can commit to – two to four hours, I can do it, so that was such a simple transformation of somebody who I thought had to be at the computer for twelve hours to a day and night to – to write.

 

Angela:

Yeah, I think of that as the legacy of Hemmingway. You have to become an alcoholic and a chain smoker and ideally miserable and cynical and alone and have no community, and then you can qualify as a writer –

 

Colleen:

Exactly.

 

Angela:

– and that’s not – it could be like that, if you choose it, but it does not have to be like that.

 

Colleen:

Exactly. The other part that is obviously very unique – well, or – was it your helpful, helpful process that you suggest is to write forward. In other words, we have our deadline, but … deadline, we turn them in, and then the editor gives back to us, and there was – I remember reading the additive pieces and – and then wondering, “Oh, did I … just go back and rewrite,” but actually, the helpful mantra of writing forward is what got – kept me going in the whole process, to write chapter after chapter. So, just write forward – i – it’s just – it’s a – it works, … that was a surprise as well.

 

Angela:

Yeah. The – the interesting thing about editing while you write is they – it just uses different parts of your brain and it – it doesn’t just slow down the process in terms of the number of hours that it might take editing and the number of hours it might take writing, but actually switching, making your brain shift from editor mode to writer mode, that adds … a tremendous amount of time and need for procrastination, and it’s … hard staying into it, so you can keep your brain focused on getting that first draft … done, and then go back and edit, both things take less time, so, yeah, I think that’s a really good tip. Well, before we wrap it up today, is there any advice that you would give to somebody who wants to write a book? Maybe they’re scaredy-cat and they’re wondering, is it now or never for me with my book? What advice would you give them? Other than to get your book on Amazon? Now or Never by Colleen Troy.

 

Colleen:

Just the – the suffering that a scaredy-cat goes through because they are not expressing themselves in the way that they truly want to is – is  just – time to end that, and release that – release your expression out into the world to make that difference that you really wanna make, … that’s – that’s what I wanna be, this whole concept of now or never. For – for people of any age, but absolutely, don’t wait, it’s a thrilling experience, it’s empowering, and – oh, from here on out, anything is po – it’s all possible. It’s all possible, after you write a boo – … don’t wait.

 

Angela:

Wow. Love it. Awesome, well, Colleen M. Troy. She is the author of the best selling book, Now or Never for Scaredy-Cats: Stop Hiding, Break Some Rules and Have Way More Fun Before It’s Too Late. You can find her book on amazon.com, you can learn more about her and her “Bloom, Baby, Bloom” podcast at colleentroy, which is spelled “T” as in Texas, “R” as in Romeo, “O” as in Opera, “Y” as in Yellow, colleentroy.com. Colleen, thank you so much for being our guest today, it’s been great having you.

 

Colleen:

Angela, thank you so much, and continue your work, it’s fabulous.

 

Angela:

Mm, thank you. Well, you guys, we are kicking off our summer programs, if you are thinking about writing a book, head on over to theauthorincubator.com/apply, we would love to learn more about you and your book and your mission to make a difference. We’ll be back with another episode of Book Journeys Radio.

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